Living With Pride in Trump’s America

The last decade of the LGBTQ+ rights movement had me feeling comfortable. I saw “gay marriage” become the law of the land, adoption rights for same-sex couples become widespread, and LGBTQ+ characters in the media being presented in a positive and happy light. It was awesome… until it wasn’t.

Since Trump was elected, I have watched hard-earned rights, laws, and forward-movement begin to slow down and erode. There has been an uptick in anti-LGBTQ hate crimes – 2017 was the worst we’ve seen in years. Over 129 anti-LGBTQ bills were introduced across the country last year. Just today, the Supreme Court ruled in favor of a Colorado baker who refused to make a wedding cake for a gay couple.

I. Am. Scared.

My instinct is to flee. Move my family to Canada to keep us safe. But that isn’t realistic and doesn’t help the LGBTQ+ community here in the U.S, especially the more vulnerable of us – people of color, trans and non-binary people, those who are differently-abled.

Rather than run, I am becoming loud. And out. To everyone. Even the people in my life I wouldn’t normally bother coming out to… The plumber. The clerk at the grocery store. The woman behind me in line at Home Depot.

After the horrific shooting at the Pulse nightclub two years ago, Kendra and I bought our first rainbow flag and hung it outside of our house. It was a simple act of solidarity that allowed us to declare that even in our little town, LGBTQ+ exist, and live, and are part of the community.

The kids and I dug it up from the basement this weekend, and once again hung it outside to celebrate Pride month. Even this little act scares me – worries me that I am making my family into a target for someone else’s hate.

But hate can’t be fought by hiding. And the stronger the anti-LGBTQ tide seems to be rising, the more I find myself clinging to living my life with pride.

I am proud of my wife and my kids. So bring on the rainbows. Bring on the Pride parades. Because we aren’t going anywhere.

I wrote this post for LGBTQ Families Day 2018. Check out Mombian.com for posts from other bloggers, or to share your own! 

You can also read my posts from past years:

• The Rolling Tide of LGBTQ Rights: Parenting with Uncertainty (2017)
• The Donor Talk: When Kids Have a Sperm Donor (2016)
• An Open Letter to Medical Professionals from a Lesbian Mom (2015)
• Blogging for LGBTQ Families 2014: We’re an Ordinary Two-Mom Family
• 2013 Blogging for LGBT Families Day: Getting Creative
• Blogging for LGBT Families Day 2012 – A Non-Bio Mom’s wish…
• 6th Annual Blogging for LGBT Families Day! (2011)